Staying Strong in Sickness and in Health

When her husband, Mr David Tan, 77, suffered a stroke two years ago, it came as a complete shock to Mdm Helene Ong. Married for more than five decades, David exercised daily and was physically fit. Just a few months earlier, the couple had been travelling together. Other than feeling tired at times, all was well.

Everything changed one day when David complained of a severe headache and suddenly collapsed on the toilet floor. 

“He was looking up at the ceiling and his face was pale. I felt helpless. I was crying and shivering,” recalls the 76-year-old former secretary. 

That was the start of Helene’s caregiving journey. She endured the stress of caring for David through his surgery and prolonged stays in the Intensive Care Unit and High Dependency Ward. He was later transferred to a community hospital where he began his long rehabilitation journey. While he could feed and bathe himself, he still required help with walking. 

“I prayed to God to heal him. I told myself to stay strong. But deep inside, I was very stressed. I couldn’t eat or sleep well. I lost 6kg within a short time!”, says Helene, adding that she also grappled with dark thoughts at her lowest point.

Caption: Helene with her husband Mr David Tan, a stroke survivor

Finding support in the community

As Helene settled down into her care routine, she began exploring ways to stay fit. That search led her to TOUCHpoint@AMK 433, an Active Ageing Centre (AAC) under TOUCH, located two blocks from her home. There, she joined the exercise sessions together with David three times a week. The pace was just right and the environment was friendly.

One day, overcome by emotions, Helene broke down in tears at the AAC. That was when Ms Melissa Tan, Senior Executive from TOUCH Caregivers Support, reached out to her through one of the caregiver group sessions, and offered guidance on some of her stressors. That moment became a turning point.

Focusing on the caregiver

Helene was then introduced to an eight-week structured group session programme designed specifically for caregivers to facilitate resource sharing and build connections among themselves through peer support. Topics include navigating healthcare and social services, reconnecting with one’s emotions and identity, and practising self-care while rediscovering personal aspirations. Caregivers are also able to share experiences and learn coping strategies from one another. 

Caption: Group Head of TOUCH Caregivers Support Ms June Sim reaching out to Helene at TOUCHpoint@AMK 433

“As a caregiver, I feel encouraged by such programmes which are focused on caregivers. Through our sharing, I realised there are other caregivers with bigger issues. Everyone is warm and friendly. We encourage one another,” adds Helene, who has learnt to view life from a different lens.

“Each sickness is different and every family has its own challenges. We must first love ourselves to love others.” 

Rediscovering balance through self-care

These days, Helene manages her days and caregiving journey with greater confidence. Other than driving her husband to medical appointments, she also makes time for herself – playing Bingo with friends at the AAC, meeting old friends for meals and connecting with other caregivers. 

Recently, Helene, together with caregivers from TOUCHpoint@AMK 433, visited TOUCHpoint@Tampines 285, TOUCH’s first integrated community hub that empowers residents through skills development, income development, caregiver support and mental wellness programmes. There, she learnt more about gerontology solutions and assistive devices to support independence and safety at home. She also attended a financial planning workshop, where she reflected on her future aspirations and took home a sand art momento. 

Caption: Caregivers attending a financial planning workshop at TOUCHpoint@Tampines 285

Caption: Helene taking time to enjoy her ice cream treat 

Caption: Helene at a caregivers group work session on self-care management

Understanding needs through Carer TORCH

Looking ahead, Helene intends to join Carer TORCH, a programme supported by the Income OrangeAid Caregiver Support Accelerator Grant, which provides one-to-one individual coaching spanning at least nine sessions. Caregivers will also be taught problem-solving skills to enable them to help themselves in the future, reducing feelings of ‘helplessness’ and increasing caregivers’ confidence and resilience.

“We are focused on supporting the needs of caregivers,” says Ms June Sim, Group Head of TOUCH Caregivers Support Group. “By providing a safe space for reflection and growth, we empower caregivers to take small, purposeful steps towards better quality of life and greater peace of mind while also supporting care recipients in becoming more independent.”

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TOUCH Caregivers Support Group (TCG) envisions a community where caregivers have peace of mind and are empowered to live fulfilling lives. Guided by a person-centred approach, TCG focuses on building caregivers’ strengths, enhancing care sustainability and improving their overall quality of life. TCG supports caregivers through a dedicated helpline (TOUCH Care Line), personalised carer-centric coaching and support group programmes, complemented by online caregiver communities that foster peer support and resilience. It also conducts talks and workshops to raise awareness and advocate for caregivers’ needs, enabling caregivers to thrive while providing sustainable care for their loved ones.

Published in 2026